5 Things to Say to Incoherent Crazy Commenters

1. I really appreciate what you're saying but I can't see you clearly enough.
2. I will only respond by referring you to my essay on this subject.
3. Could I speak to the drug dealer of the house, please?
4. I can smell your underwear through the phone. (ht Merlin Mann)
5. That's interesting. Could you expound on that a little more? (Repeat ad infinitum)